This weekend God taught me many things. As we face leaving our children for a week to go to orientation, I find myself struggling with the fact that we will have to be so far from them for a whole week. While I completely trust the care of our children to my brother and his wife, I still won't be there! It's funny, as I have gone through life looking forward to different stages, believing I will reach them with sheer delight, I find each step is bitter-sweet. I should be thrilled (and I am, really) that we are finally heading for consideration by a mission agency. We have dreamed of this day for more years than I like to think about. While we are excited though, I find it difficult to leave our children. God is so wonderful though. The song I posted for a friend last week, "I'll Go Where You Want Me To Go", ended up being a blessing and a challenge to me this weekend. I was scheduled to sing for the Sunday evening service. As usual I prayed and sought for a song. Also as usual I asked for my husband's input. The thing that was not usual was that he had no opinion about what song I would sing this time. As I sang through countless songs, I could not find peace about any of them. Then the Lord led me to this song. God used a line from the third verse to help me to stay focused on Him and what He has planned for me and for my family: "So, trusting my all unto Your care, I know You always love me! I’ll do Your will with a heart sincere. . ." Usually when I sing a special for church, I try my best to build a climax in the song with dynamics and such, but for this song I could not. Last night it came out as a prayer and at some points barely came out. How amazing God is to use the common (I've known this song for decades!) to reach us at different points in our lives! He is teaching me to trust Him. Sometimes I'm a slow learner!
I have always been a dreamer with big plans. Big plans and dreams are not the same as accomplishments. Though these can lead to great accomplishments, I tend to get distracted along the way. Sometimes I spend too much time dreaming, planning, making lists, creating ideas, and not enough time on the "petty" details that are required to accomplish such things. As the Lord has brought me along, particularly since having children, I have learned much in this area of disciplining myself to finish the mundane tasks of life before I allow myself the privilege of planning my great dreams. Facing a summer which is the beginning of a new stage in our lives, I once again have struggled with the menial tasks of life. I desire to burst ahead to the thing I have been looking forward to for so long! How thankful I am that the Lord is patient with me and helps me to refocus with His Word. Today in my devotions God again showed me a verse He used once before to order my thoughts and help me to keep my eyes fixed on what I need to accomplish now. Sometimes my thoughts are a my worst enemy simply because they are running in all directions in my head, plowing one another over vying for preeminence. I need God's help to order them! The verse God gave me today was, Proverb 16:3, "Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established." Now, as I have asked the Lord to help me to commit my works to Him, I know that he will establish my thoughts. He's the only one who can really order all of these things in the first place! I told you I'm a slow learner. Thankfully He is a loving and patient God!